i had to buy some with my per cap to get by. i said i dont know why i have to buy mine when many have it stacked outside. and my nephew and the crew he worked on brought me some. i told the guy i just figured someone didnt like me. thats the way it works many times in our tribal organization. it dont even have to have anything to do with you. if they dont like someone in your family then they dont like you either. and you get nothing.

the guy i knew said he would cut it for me. said i had to have a work order in. i told him the bureacucrat on the phone said once i was on the list that was it. they would take care of it. a month and a half into winter i still didnt have any wood. we called a number of times. nothing.  a council guy said he would look into it. nothing.  i thought that was the way it worked. i was told i was on the list. someone else called and was told they took care of everyone on the list. i didnt get any wood . i finally got some and it was only half a load. then two half loads since then.  i assumed that was it. i wasnt gonna beg anyone. if i was able i would just do it myself. those days are gone.

so today the guy i knew brought me a load. they were told to wait for a work order. i was told i wouldnt have to fill anything out. another case of the left hand not knowing what the right hand is doing i guess. reality is some tribal employees wont do a damn thing for anyone. thats sad. i have to run ceremonies all the time. whether i want to or not. whether i am busy or not. i just do it. i dont make up excuses. i would hate to be like one of them tontos.  then when they need help they come to me. and i do it.